| No I'm not dead |
[Apr. 14th, 2004|01:38 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | empty/satisfied | ] |
| [ | music |
| | albainian folk music | ] |
Hi everyone I do look on here now and then you know.
I can't sleep. I don't know what I want to talk about.
Isn't it odd how we choose to broadcast our lives to the world here. Do we think we are really that interesting? Is this a way of articulating the otherwise unspoken thoughts we need to share? cold communication or a warm electronic nexus, wrapping ourselves in optic cables for comfort, absorbing the glow of the screen. whirring fan like a sound in the womb.... or hiding from reality. bedroom floor, badass pictures, pretend friends, silicon facade, I'm so fucking - kiss my ass - cool on-line.
Sorry, I get a little philosophical when deprived of sleep (they say it happens in the autumn years). Nihilism (we believe in nothing/will cut off you j-ch-onson). go to bed, shut up, (show me that you love me and we belong together), abstract, cpu intellectual, wish you were me. ....the stupid still breath......
I look forward to work tomorrow, to absorption in... y' know. and (I love you so much) Jen. life's beautiful (dreamer)
gods of the flesh.....
(re-lax settle down and take my hand) |
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| shooting shit |
[Nov. 27th, 2003|01:57 am] |
I fucked up today (you know what I'm talking about (maybye I'm just paranoid, It's all in the mind)). I slept all evening today thus accomplishing nothing or feasibly less. Anyone every tried to grasp the concept of absolute zero? Absolute zero is Intangible, by definition it is nothing-nihil, but concurrently everthing- a void as big as the mind at the centre of it all, all consuming. Some stare even scream and expect no answer, some dive in, many drown, some swim miles apart yet in unison as one.
Exuse all the commas,. |
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| and later |
[Nov. 25th, 2003|12:33 am] |
so here i am alive one hour later and I still cant figure this fucking computer shit out! Must get Brett based tuition. Anyway a little about me, in my LJ you will see the side of me that in public only trusted freinds ever see. I love the net because it offers the beauty and anonimity that face to face contact has never provided me. No masks are worn here exept by the shallow. all our insecurities are raw and stinging they are allways wounds that we will never allow to heal or at the best show only as welt red scars on our pale soft exteriors. to me this is like lying awake in the dark, in our own inner void, listening to our own cascade of seemingly meaningless internal dialogue, a way to phonograph my spirit. I share this with you to bring meaning to meaningless existence. when you see me, comment on my updates as I would never talk to flesh and blood humans this way if it were left solely to myself. I hope that on internal inspection we all really think like this because if you do not I am truely fucked....
Love and fistings,
Andrew |
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| and later |
[Nov. 25th, 2003|12:33 am] |
so here i am alive one hour later and I still cant figure this fucking computer shit out! Must get Brett based tuition. Anyway a little about me, in my LJ you will see the side of me that in public only trusted freinds ever see. I love the net because it offers the beauty and anonimity that face to face contact has never provided me. No masks are worn here exept by the shallow. all our insecurities are raw and stinging they are allway wounds that we will never allow to heal or at the best show only as welt red scars on our pale soft exteriors. to me this is like lying awake in the dark, in our own inner void, listening to our own cascade of seemingly meaningless internal dialogue, a way to phonograph my spirit. I share this with you to bring meaning to meaningless existence. when you see me, comment on my updates as I would never talk to flesh and blood humans this way if it were left solely to myself. I hope that on internal inspection we all really think like this because if you do not I am truely fucked....
Love and fistings,
Andrew |
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| here at last |
[Nov. 24th, 2003|11:05 pm] |
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So here i am at last with nothing interesting to say, but at least i am here. I trust everyone is well especialy my lady. Presently I will start archiving my collection of unsettling veiws from nihil, untill then my odd fellows I shall retire to nose through you own disquieting lives. |
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god_of_flesh's journal